Blinds

My bedroom window looks out over several levels of outdoor walkways that other tenants in my apartment building use to get their units. Not the best view, but nothing to complain about.

Here’s the thing: I keep forgetting that windows work both ways. I like to keep my blinds open to let in natural light because I’m pro-ultraviolet radiation, but then I start doing things like changing my underwear or picking my nose or making faces at myself in the mirror if I have a few minutes to spare.

And by “I like to keep my the blinds open” I don’t mean turning the little rod so light comes through the slits. I mean balls-to-walls-no-BS-the-sun-is-free-electricity blinds drawn so there’s nothing but a glass pane separating the world and me trying to put my foot behind my head.

I keep the blinds open out of pure lack of awareness that the people I can see walking to the elevator can also see me talking to myself. It’s only a matter of time until I make eye contact with a passerby. And when it does, I will smile, wave, and continue smell-testing my dirty clothes.

I guess what I’m saying is make sure you’re aware of your surroundings, unless you want your neighbors to know that you still watch American Idol.